Hmmm
I guess it is time for me to write something.
I had been having the thoughts of despair & doom again, since a while. It had become unbearable for me to continue with the night calls and stuff.
The severity of palpitations and breathlessness kind of increased and it was alarming and I finally thought I should go and consult someone again. My blood pressure was the usual for me i.e. 144/100 mmHg. But still, I was advised some more medications to keep my heart a bit safe from all the pressure. I was advised complete rest and since we are not supposed to take sick leaves, I had to go and plead to the professor for it.
He said something that made me think about my future.
He said and I quote "Even my father-in-law had hypertension but he got it at a later age, you still have about two thirds of your life left ahead of you...hmmm...My father-in-law somehow managed but his last time was really difficult. After the stroke, he died neuron by neuron. A really painful death."
Even though I have started my medications and trying to fight the feelings of doom & despair, these words kinda stay with me....he died a very painful death, neuron by neuron....
Is my end going to be like that?
Neuron by neuron.....
I guess it is time for me to write something.
I had been having the thoughts of despair & doom again, since a while. It had become unbearable for me to continue with the night calls and stuff.
The severity of palpitations and breathlessness kind of increased and it was alarming and I finally thought I should go and consult someone again. My blood pressure was the usual for me i.e. 144/100 mmHg. But still, I was advised some more medications to keep my heart a bit safe from all the pressure. I was advised complete rest and since we are not supposed to take sick leaves, I had to go and plead to the professor for it.
He said something that made me think about my future.
He said and I quote "Even my father-in-law had hypertension but he got it at a later age, you still have about two thirds of your life left ahead of you...hmmm...My father-in-law somehow managed but his last time was really difficult. After the stroke, he died neuron by neuron. A really painful death."
Even though I have started my medications and trying to fight the feelings of doom & despair, these words kinda stay with me....he died a very painful death, neuron by neuron....
Is my end going to be like that?
Neuron by neuron.....
